Untitled (weather)

lying in the back of a Volvo wagon he says he's going to kill himself
in the driver's seat below eucalyptus trees
he smokes his meth near pathways that I'll later hike
and go to my great aunts house for Thanksgiving dinner
"you look great"
"I eat a lot of beans"
spoken through teeth fossilized
I bought my first CD at Barnes and Noble after dinner at Tomatina
a white and orange Sony cd player
headphones too
sold for cash
cash for drugs
drugs for hell
a hell that no one would choose
but it chose you
birthday money
purple lucite Gameboy
blank checks
sanity
safety
calm
a body never soothed
only soiled and groomed
to expect fire hurled at any moment
and an especially ferocious burst during full moons
punctuating a storm that already picked up speed
consuming everything in its wake
pulling contortions that years later have only begun to uncoil
and invite back in
sanity
safety
calm